To the flicking newspaper man
I'm short. I don't lean my head back over the seat backwards as I don't really want my hair on the seat. Therefore, I don't quite understand how the top part of your newspaper flicked onto my head twice. Granted, the second time wasn't a big deal, but people CAN feel the weight of a newspaper on their head, so you might want to learn that personal space is not just for the person next to you, but in front of you too.

The first thing dumbass will
The first thing dumbass will say is: "Oh, I didn't see you." Please don't kill him, just shred his paper with your claws. ;)